70th Birthday Wishes


I bought you a green balloon, but it busted.
I found you a red convertible car, but it rusted.
I wrung my hands and didn’t know what to do,
So I came up with a birthday wish for you:
“Whenever you need help, a laugh, a sidekick, a counselor, a friend or two,
I promise to always, always see you through.”

Be a club-hopping septuagenarian,
I advise.
Scream “foo, you!” to being a vegetarian,
I recommend,
And go on a date with a librarian.
You’re only 70 once,
So spend it with a friend.

If life was Hollywood,
I’d call you box office.

I wished for you long ago
When a genie came to me and begged my thoughts to know.
I asked for a kind friend, a wise guide, no regrets –
Now you’re 70 years old;
I’m glad the genie didn’t forget.

Out of the hundreds of birthdays that are happening today –
And trust me, that’s a lot!
I pick yours without delay,
Because you are my happiest thought.

At a vague, indefinable point in time, a car passes from “beat-up clunker” to “historic automobile.” I’m glad to see you’ve also made the change.

When you first walked into life’s light,
Perhaps you strode in the shadow of men
Who knew how to fight life’s plight,
And you compared what you did now to what they did then.
Now I wish you look backwards; I bid you look behind;
You’ll see a young man, I suspect,
Who for you harbors great respect.
So happy birthday to a true leader, one of a kind,
One who found life and freely gave it to the generation behind.

Welcome to your years of reverse depreciation.

One word seems trite
When covering 70 years of vibrant life,
But one word is all I hold, all I know.
That word is love,
And the older you become, the more it grows.

I pegged you for a sprinter, but I see you’ve opted for long distance.

A maple tree glows most beautiful just before the winter;
The sky ignites and dances just before the night.
So as you stride into your years of twilight,
Believe that they are the most wonderful you will ever enter.

Wishing for all the best on this special day.
I wish you good luck, good health,
And hope that you will stay awake
To blow out the candles on your birthday cake.

I knew this before you puckered and blew,
But no one could ever hold a candle to you.
Have a wonderful birthday!

May your next 70 years be filled with 100 hullabaloos,
30 jubilees, 562 “I love you’s”
And, of course, countless friends.
I’m here to help you begin.
Happy Birthday!

Happy seventieth. I’m here to extend your warranty.

May God bless your success;
May your treasures be too great to measure;
May the Lord guide you to unexplored shores.
May your peace forever increase,
And may your seventies always be heavenly.

I wish you rocket-propelled wheelchairs
And a full head of unruly hair.
I wish you scantily clad bingo girls
And twelve grandchildren to give you a whirl.
Happy Birthday!